The School Newspaper for California High School, San Ramon CA

2016: A Burrito Odyssey

2016: A Burrito Odyssey

Brendan Ogburn, Josh Iverson,, Patrick Rettig, and Aaron Velasquez
November 7, 2016
Filed under News Lite

Four men on a quest to satisfy their hunger the only way they know how, a fat burrito that sits in their stomach.  The quest was long, ardous, and dangerous but all who embarked survived. This is their story. Mexxi’s calls itself a “authentic Mexican restaurant,” but that couldn’t... Read more »

Victoriano’s Secret: Friendship?

Victoriano’s Secret: Friendship?

Brandon Victoriano, Advice Communist
November 7, 2016
Filed under News Lite

Dear Brandon, Hi, I’m a senior and I was wondering how I could make some friends. It’s been four years and although we will all be moving away after this year, I can’t stand the loneliness anymore. What should I do?         Sincerely, Anonymous Dear Anonymous, Friends?... Read more »

Note 7 blows away the competition

Ilene Morrisette, Staff Writer
November 7, 2016
Filed under News Lite

The new Samsung Note 7 has proven to have recently become a very hot product. One can say it has really blown up with consumers.  Recently there have been many cases of the smartphone overheating and exploding.  According to Forbes, part of the reason behind the aforementioned explos... Read more »

Lone Star State becomes loner

Aaron Velasquez, Staff Writer
September 29, 2016
Filed under News Lite

Since the dawn of time man has tried to unravel the mystery as to why Texas has this never-ending desire to secede from the Union. The newest movement to secede has been headed by Daniel Miller, a sixth generation Texan. He is the head of The Texas Nationalist Movement (TNM), which has been fighting... Read more »

Emojis take over

Kaitlyn Martin, Staff Writer
September 29, 2016
Filed under News Lite

Apple unveiled earlier this month 100 new and redesigned emojis, which were distributed among the buyers and loyal customers for the IOS 10. These brand new super duper emojis are either slightly altered or completely different from the original ones. For example, the former gun emoji used to indicate... Read more »

Victoriano’s Secret: Sexy advice

Victoriano’s Secret: Sexy advice

Brandon Victoriano, Advice Columnist
September 29, 2016
Filed under News Lite

Editor’s note: After a year hiatus, the News Lite advice column is back!  We apologize to our readers in advance. Dear Brandon, I have this friend who is obsessed with memes. What should I do? Are there support groups? Sincerely, Triggered Dear Poor-Taste-in-Friends, I offer you my... Read more »

Finishing strong?

Kat LeTran, Staff Writer
June 3, 2016
Filed under News Lite

The inevitable season has come again this year. Parents are desperate. Students are sluggish. Teachers are at their wits’ ends. No, it’s not the flu season, or even allergy season. It’s the end of the year slump. Everybody knows about senioritis. As the weather gets warmer and seniors... Read more »

Staff writers rate Cal’s bathrooms

Staff writers rate Cal’s bathrooms

Josh Iversen and Chiara Ty
June 3, 2016
Filed under News Lite

As human beings, certain bodily functions are necessary for survival and thus deserve to be respected. Our school, however, has at times exhibited blatant disrespect for these functions with dirty, poorly-stocked restrooms. So we decided to investigate, and find out exactly which bathrooms are adequate fo... Read more »

They see him floatin, they be a hatin’

They see him floatin, they be a hatin’

Taylor Singer, Staff Writer
June 3, 2016
Filed under News Lite

A 42-year-old Florida man was rescued last month in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean after trying to embark on a 3,000-mile long nautical journey aboard an inflatable hamster ball. This modern Magellan made it a mere 70 miles and three days into his seafaring adventure, only to be “voluntarily”... Read more »

Trump’s secret tower

Trump’s secret tower

Karina Myrenget, Staff Writer
April 29, 2016
Filed under News Lite

The Trump Erotic novel was a highly anticipated work of fiction this year. The idea started with a few tweets by comedian Elijah Daniel, who started tweeting about getting drunk, writing an entire sex novel about Donald Trump, and putting it on Amazon. He ended up following through with his promise,... Read more »

The School Newspaper for California High School, San Ramon CA
News Lite