Welcome to Florida, a bruise on America’s hip
Wyatt Golla, Reporter
November 19, 2019
If you thought that California was America’s pothole, let me introduce you to the state having spasms in the gutter. Meet Florida, and its bold and highly fanatical population. For those of you who don’t know, “Florida Man” is a meme about the crazy things that the men and women of Florida...
Trump looks to undermine California in battle for the ages
Liann Bielicki, Reporter
November 19, 2019
Ladies and gentlemen, let’s get ready to rumble. Two heavy-hitters are about to enter the ring in the case of Trump v. California. The two have been known to trade blows in and out of the court system. In one corner, President Donald J. Trump. In the other, the State of California. It’s...
Fridays are for the Aliens
Joshua Nichols, News Lite Editor
October 14, 2019
The most anticipated storming of a secretive Air Force Base in American history happened on Sept. 20. Kinda. “AlienStock” was not a bop, but rather a over-hyped flop. Rather than a Spartan style siege of Area 51, we were instead gifted with dancing, alien bodysuits, and some Chad with a...
BART? More like BARF (Get it, ‘cuz it’s trash?)
Abhyudaya Srivastava, Reporter
October 14, 2019
A few months ago, a woman sat down on a seat in a BART train on what she thought was chocolate, except it wasn’t. Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) is supposed to be a fast and efficient way to get around the Bay Area, but recently it’s been everything but that. One man was so fed up about crazy thin...
The Stairs are Cruel to this Freshman
Wyatt Golla, Reporter
October 14, 2019
Please have pity on me, for I have the displeasure of taking a miniature hike every day and I have no say in the matter. I have four periods that require vast amounts of labor just to get to my next academic activity. Yes, I have to walk up several flights of stairs every day, and that’s only counting...
Sister scandal = sayonara snake
Joshua Nichols, Staff Writer
May 29, 2019
I cannot believe I am using my talents to write this. Now I’ll be honest, the only time I have ever watched anything James Charles is when it is being spoon fed to me, dank meme style on Twitter. In case you were in a coma and you still don’t know who Charles is, then just remember...
Embrace senioritis, the ruthless disease
Siddhant Gupta, Managing Editor
May 29, 2019
With every day that goes by that we have to endure eight grueling hours at an educational institution comes that insatiable urge to just… not care. As we get closer and closer to the end of the school year, a seasonal epidemic sweeps through our school. Tardies are stockpiled, attendance...
Anti-Vax movement is clueless
Joshua Nichols, Staff Writer
May 2, 2019
Vaccinations are good. Right? Polio, Measles, Mumps, Influenza, Pertussis, Tetanus, HPV, Meningitis, Chicken Pox, Hepatitis A, and Hepatitis B are all diseases or illnesses people can be vaccinated against. And while half of them sound like the names of upper echelon Italian fashion brands, it...
Another one bites the dust – AAF is latest to fail
Andrew Sousa, Sports Editor
May 2, 2019
It’ll work this time, I promise. These are the words that so many commissioners of football leagues say, determined to show that their “sexy, new age” league will be able to stand with and even take down the NFL. They are all wrong. On April 2, the Alliance of American Football annou...
The death of ‘Fortnite’ is near
Andrew Sousa, Sports Editor
March 26, 2019
At the beginning of time, there was Pong. Then there was Mario. Then there was Minecraft. And then there was... “Fortnite.” Throughout history, video games have come and gone, evolving with times. They’ve revolutionized the entertainment industry and almost always found themselves on top of...