The newest craze: Schoology bios

New feature to school grading platform leads to unsurprising outcomes


Wyatt Golla

Students such as News Lite Editor Wyatt Golla have made the most out of the new Schoology bio feature by highlighting their interests, hobbies and, of course, their cleverness.

Say goodbye to Instagram and Snapchat.
A new form of social media has risen. It’s the grading platform, Schoology. All others pale in comparison.
Many students discovered at the start of the year that there’s a new option allowing them to “write a short bio” in the Schoology settings. Along with the bio option, students can include interests, activities, and contact information. Students can even insert a profile picture.
With an endless amount of options for their bios, many students have made the most of this opportunity.
“I was messing around [on Schoology] and saw it [the bio feature], and I love it!” sophomore Sophia VanDerbeek said.
Other students, however, feel indifferent to the function.
“I clicked many buttons on Schoology and accidentally found it,” sophomore Daksh Singh said. “It is strange. I do not know why there’s a bio feature.”
I agree. It’s unexpected, but let’s run with it. The opportunities are limitless.
Although it’s a hidden, out-of-place detail, many students have already taken advantage of the new tool for comedic purposes.
“Have a nice day. Why are you here?” Singh’s profile read.
Good question, yet somehow, I don’t even know. Yikes man, are you gonna make me have an existential crisis about why I chose to publish an article on Schoology bios? Oh, and I hope you have a nice day too.
VanDerbeek added to the overall humor of the situation, stating in her bio, “I love Austin Butler.”
Apparently, VanDerbeek is a big Butler fan.
“I love his face and his voice and his face!” she said.
I couldn’t agree more! I mean, look at him.
One student took this humor even further. Sophomore Srinath Parvatine’s bio included multiple links to Rick Astley’s notorious “Never Gonna Give You Up”. After all, a rickroll is truly a hallmark of the internet.
Side note, Astley turns 57 next year! Don’t you think his age is the real rickroll? I don’t think I could imagine him in any other scenario than an odd video found within the intricate fibers of the internet. Man, time flies.
From asking around campus, the consensus on the bios was either “What do you mean you can write a biography on Schoology?” or “Uh, yeah, I’ve seen it, and well…it exists I guess.”
Not many people seem to care about this endearing aspect, lovingly included by the creators of Schoology. Hopefully more students will take note of the feature during the school year, and everyone could have their own profile.
Mainstream social media is perfect for meeting companions. But there are many other ways to be outgoing, such as making a phone call, meeting up for brunch, or my favorite medium, the free-to-use, hip and trendy Schoology.
Who knows, maybe after this is published, other students might want to make their own bios on Schoology. Doubtful.