As you may know, I am pretty good at life and basically run this school.
I also am very generous and will be donating my precious time and advice to help the future generations at Cal High.
The best place to start is with your wardrobe.
I recommend the brightest clothing, neon if possible. From there you definitely want some catchy slogans and funny jokes on your clothes, such as “I paused my game to be here.”
If you’re wearing shorts, it is common knowledge that you must wear long socks that go up to the knee.
Now that you got the right look for high school, it’s time to select the right classes.
There are many courses and only a limited selection that you may sign up for during your four years.
I would start with a few basic AP classes to get the foundation of your schedule.
From there I would look into a few more AP classes that are electives and will help with some of your A-G requirements.
Lastly, you will probably want a B period and I would fill that with an AP class too because I’m sure we all know that the only path to success is solely through AP classes and giving yourself as much work as possible.
Obviously there’s more to the high school experience than just the actual classes. This includes sports, jobs, internships, friendships, and more.
Because I’m very cool and lowkey a baller, I’ve done all of these things and highly recommend giving them all a try.
Please also give golf a try. it is inarguably the best sport of all time and your life will be so much better afterwards.
Supposedly playing golf may even help with your dating life, though I’m still waiting for that to happen…
Now let’s say you are very comfortable with high school but are feeling a little nervous about what comes next. Here are some things to keep in mind.
Success is a subjective word, meaning inherently there is more than one path to success and you shouldn’t feel forced into a path that doesn’t fit you.
I’m sure many of you would like to be like me, but there is only one of me and one of you, so do what’s best for you.
As sad as it may be to hear, our parents won’t live with us forever and won’t be able to always take care of us.
It is very important to learn how to be more independent and self-sufficient, especially before you have to actually live on your own.
For example, I recently learned how to use the microwave AND toaster, so I have essentially mastered cooking. I also make a mean cereal if anyone would like to try it.
Other ways of transitioning into adulthood include getting your license and managing your money.
Getting your license is pretty easy, though the process takes at least 6-7 months and can be longer, so start as early as possible.
There is nothing better than getting Raising Canes at 1 a.m., so I highly recommend starting your license process asap!
As someone who works at the financial planning firm Certified Planners, I know a thing or two about money. I also have an A in AP Economics, but it’s no big deal.
Anyways, as tempting as it may be to spend your entire paycheck (don’t be jobless) on In-N-Out and Taco Bell, you need to learn self-control and start saving.
You can even open a retirement account if you want to be rich, retire early, and be really handsome. I have a retirement account if you couldn’t tell.
The last piece of advice that is applicable to literally anyone still in high school is just make the most out of your time here.
A friend of mine once told me, “If you can’t get out of it, get into it,” and that is very applicable to the high school experience.
Regardless of your desire, you’re going to be here for a few years, so you might as well enjoy it.
Go to school events like homecoming, prom and ball. Go to school productions like plays and concerts.
And most importantly, read the school newspaper! (Unbiased opinion, of course).
Good luck out there, though if you need my advice, you’ll be doing just fine.
