By Amelia Arvesen, Staff Writer

Do you prefer awk or kwerd? A new lingo has emerged among Cal High studes called “abreevs.” If one isn’t educated in this lang it’s almost as hard to understand as the Sims.

“Basically you can abreev any word,” said senior Avi Feldman.  “Just cut off the end.”

Take Avi’s advice. If one isn’t sure whether the words they are preparing to speak are real, don’t think about it. Just chop the word completely in half and pronounce that.

For ex, if there are eight letters in the word, use the first four or the last four. Everyone will understand.

Anyone can learn this language, unlike Spanish. Senior Kate MacLeod said she picked up abreevs because her friends started using it this past summer.

“Guys hate them,” said Kate. “Unless they’re making fun of us.”

But sophomore Charlie Pershau disagrees. He would characterize people who use abreevs as “incredibly educated” and “fantastic human beings all around.”

Charlie said he uses “legit” nonstop. Most people don’t even know that this is an abbreviation.

“We only have so much time to live,” said Charlie, “and we want to get our point across in these short 80 years so we resort to cutting words in half.”

Abreevs may also be used to annoy people in cereal situations.

For example, if one is told by his mother to get a better grade in their English class one can say “Whatevs. This convo is supes awk. I’m already perf.”

Drama teacher Laura Woods uses abreevs to be funny with her play production class. Her fave abreevs include J.I.C., dins, rehears, and W.T.G.

Abreevs are most commonly used in texts and on Facebook, but they are beginning to appear in people’s speaking on a reg basis.

Junior Kelly Iaquinta is a frequent user of abreevs. She noticed that she uses them among a certain group of her friends.

“I think we’re just too lazy to use the whole word,” she said.

If one characterizes oneself as a non-believer in abreevs, one should get with the program and memorize all the abreevs in the dictionary.

One should study them even more than one would study for ones Calc test. One wouldn’t want to embar oneself.